05

Chapter 3: The Conflict of Heart and Distance

Anshika sat in the college library, her fingers lightly skimming the edges of her book, but her mind was elsewhere. Kartikey. A soft sigh escaped her lips as she leaned back, rubbing her temples.

"Tu theek hai?" Meera, her closest friend, nudged her.

"Are you okay?"

"Haan, bas thodi thak gayi hoon," she murmured, avoiding eye contact.

"Yes, I'm just tired."

But she wasn't just tired. She was confused.

Over the past few days, she'd found herself slipping-laughing too easily at his jokes, talking to him for longer than necessary, and worst of all, feeling comfortable. She was opening up to him, bit by bit, without realizing it. And that scared her.

She had never been this way with a boy before. It was drilled into her from a young age-boundaries, limits, respectability. Her family was strict, not cruel, but traditional. Unmarried girls didn't get too close to boys, didn't spend too much time alone with them, didn't entertain lingering gazes or deep conversations. And yet, here she was.

The memory of their interaction flashed before her eyes.

During a lunch break, Kartikey had been teasing her, as usual, making some joke about how she always carried a novel around like it was her lifeline.

"Bas... kahaniyan pasand hai mujhe," she had admitted.

"I just... like stories."

"Aur khud ki kahani ka kya?" he had asked, leaning forward slightly, his gaze too sharp.

"What about your story?"

Without thinking, she had whispered, "Use likhna mere haath mein kaha hai?"

"Writing that is not in my hands."

The moment the words left her mouth, she regretted them. That was too much, too personal. She immediately looked away, pretending to focus on her plate, hoping he wouldn't press further.

But Kartikey was quiet for a few seconds before he said, "Kya pata, kab kaun likhne aa jaye."

"You never know, when someone comes to write it."

Her heart had pounded in response, but she quickly changed the topic, talking about an upcoming assignment instead.

Even now, as she sat in the library, she could feel his presence a few tables away. His laughter, low yet distinct, reached her ears, making her stomach twist uncomfortably. She had to remind herself that she was just another junior for him, just another person he interacted with.

She had always been cautious. She knew what her family would expect of her. Girls like her didn't get involved with boys like him- But then, why did she feel this pull toward him? Why did his words, his presence, his smile affect her more than they should?

A deep sigh left her lips as she shook her head, forcing herself to focus on the textbook in front of her.

"Bas. Yeh zyada ho raha hai. Kartikey se door rehna hi better hoga," she decided.

She had to take a step back before it was too late. Before she forgot who she was supposed to be.

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Anshika tapped her pen against her notebook, her brows furrowed as she reread her notes. The library was quiet, except for the occasional rustle of pages and whispers of students. Across from her, Kartikey sat with his laptop open, effortlessly typing away.

She hadn't planned to sit with him, but somehow, it had happened. Just like the other times-after class, during break, after her practice. It was becoming a pattern, and that scared her.

"Mujhe thoda distance rakhna chahiye," she thought, stealing a glance at him. It wasn't just that he was a senior, or that he was popular-it was the way she felt around him. Too comfortable. Too open.

"Anshika?" Kartikey's voice pulled her out of her thoughts. "Tum sunn bhi rahi ho?"

"Are you even listening?"

"Huh?" She blinked, realizing she had zoned out.

He smirked. "Main keh raha tha, yeh case study thodi tricky hai. Tum apna perspective batao, I wanna know what you think."

"I was saying this case study is a little tricky, tell me your perspective on it."

She hesitated. It wasn't the question-it was the way he said it. Like he genuinely wanted her opinion. Like her words mattered.

But did they? Did she?

She swallowed, forcing herself to answer, but the whole time, her mind screamed at her. Ye sab sahi hai?

Kartikey was supposed to be reading a case study on business strategies, but his eyes kept flickering to the girl in front of him-her brows furrowed, her fingers absentmindedly twirling the edge of a page.

"Tum dhyaan bhi de rahi ho ya bas acting kar rahi ho?" Kartikey teased, his voice low.

"Are you even focusing or just acting?"

Anshika shot him a glare before turning her attention back to the notebook. "Padh rahi hoon."

"I am studying."

"Pakka?" He leaned forward slightly. "Toh batao, abhi kya line padhi?"

"Sure? Then tell me what line did you read just now?"

She pursed her lips, flipping the page with more force than necessary. "Mujhe disturb mat karo, Kartikey."

"Don't disturb me, Kartikey."

A small smirk played on his lips. "Theek hai, nahi karta."

"Okay fine, I won't."

Just as she reached for her pen that had rolled toward him, he also moved to grab his own. Their fingers brushed against each other, a light fleeting touch, but it was enough to make her breath hitch.

Her fingers stilled for a fraction of a second. Warm. His skin was warm.

Kartikey, too, paused. His smirk faded just slightly, replaced by something softer, more curious. His thumb instinctively brushed over her knuckle before she quickly pulled her hand back.

Anshika swallowed. "Mera pen." Her voice came out quieter than she intended.

"My pen."

He let out a slow breath, as if trying to shake off whatever had just happened. But his eyes still held that knowing glint, the one that told her he had noticed-noticed the way she had tensed, noticed the way her cheeks had warmed.

"Tumhara pen," he said, handing it over, fingers deliberately brushing hers again, just briefly.

"Your pen."

Anshika snatched it and looked away, pretending to focus on her book.

But even as she read, the words blurred in front of her eyes. Because all she could think about was the way his touch had lingered, just for a moment, and the way it had made her heart skip a beat.

Why? With Kartikey, she forgot her carefully built walls. She let herself relax, let herself enjoy their conversations. She had even begun sharing tiny details-her love for monsoon, how she secretly enjoyed sketching, how she he likes black coffee. She never shared anything about her with people let alone these intimate things.

One evening, Kartikey and Anshika sat on the college canteen's outdoor benches, the warm evening air carrying the familiar aroma of chai. Kartikey took a slow sip from his kulhad and glanced at Anshika, who was holding hers but hadn't taken a sip yet.

"Kya hua? Chai thandi ho rahi hai," he nudged her playfully.

"What happened? Your tea is getting cold,"

She stiffened for a fraction of a second before her fingers around her chai kulhad tighter, as if grounding herself. But the warmth that spread through her had nothing to do with the chai.

Anshika hesitated for a second before sighing. "Voh... mujhe chai itni pasand nahi hai."

"That... actually I don't like tea that much."

Kartikey froze mid-sip, staring at her like she had just confessed to a crime. "Kya?"

"What?"

She winced at his reaction. "Mujhe chai itni pasand nahi hai... matlab, main chai nahi peeti."

"I don't like it that much... I mean I don't drink tea."

"Par tum toh hamesha mere saath chai peeti ho," he said, disbelief evident in his voice.

"But you always have tea with me,"

Anshika bit her lip, looking down at the kulhad in her hands. "Woh... bas... tum bolte the toh, toh maine kabhi mana nahi kiya."

"That it's just... you ask so I never denied."

Kartikey blinked, setting his kulhad down. "Toh matlab tum sirf meri wajah se chai peeti rahi?"

"So you just kept drinking tea because of me?"

"Uhh... huh?" She gave him an awkward smile. "Nahi... maine bas bataya nahi, main black coffee peeti hoon"

"No... I just didn't tell you, I drink black coffee."

For a moment, Kartikey just stared at her before dramatically clutching his chest. "Yeh toh dhokha hai! Tum toh meri chai partner thi!"

"This is betrayal! You were my chai partner!"

Anshika rolled her eyes. "You are being too dramatic about this."

"Arre! Main tumhe kitne pyaar se chai pilata tha, sochta tha ki hum dono ko ek hi cheez pasand hai. Aur tum... tum black coffee wali nikli?" He shook his head in exaggerated disappointment. "Dil tod diya, Anshika."

"I used to get you tea with so much love, I used to think we liked the same thing. And you... you like black coffee? You broke my heart, Anshika."

She let out a soft laugh, shaking her head at his antics. "Toh... ab kya? Dosti tod doge?"

"So... now what? You will break our friendship?"

Kartikey sighed dramatically, then smirked. "Nahi, ab se black coffee peelunga tumhare saath. Lekin ek condition hai."

'No, I will have black coffee with you from now on. But I have a condition."

"Kya?" she asked warily.

"What?"

"Tumhe kabhi kabhi mere saath chai peeni padegi. Compromise karna padega."

"You'll have to drink tea with me sometimes. You'll have to comprise."

Kartikey grinned, leaning back. "Here's a deal, agli baar tum mere saath meri favourite chai peene chalogi, aur main tumhare saath black coffee peene."

"Next time you will go for my favourite tea with me, and I will go with you for coffee."

Anshika stiffened. "I need to go," she said suddenly, her voice tight.

Kartikey blinked, his brows slightly furrowed. "Abhi? Par-"

"Now? But-"

"I just... I forgot something," she mumbled, standing up hurriedly. She grabbed her bag without looking at him and walked away, her steps quicker than usual.

Kartikey watched her retreating figure, his frown fading into something more thoughtful.

She wasn't just running from him.

She was running from whatever she was feeling.

Lekin ab bas.

She needed to pull herself back before it was too late.

Sitting on the bed in her room that night, staring at her reflection in the mirror, she knew she had to be more careful. She wasn't supposed to talk to him like this. She wasn't supposed to get close.

Her family had always told her where her limits lay. And Kartikey was way beyond them. Her mother's words echoed in her mind-'Apni hadd yaad rakhna beta, humare yahan kaisa hota hai pata hai na?, papa aur dadaji ka naam kharab nahi hona chahiye, itni dur bhej rahe hai dadaji sirf padhai pe dhyaan dena.'

She clutched knees tighter to her chest, her resolve hardening. She had to stop this before it became something she couldn't control.

She had to step back.

For the next few days, Anshika avoided him. No long conversations, no sitting together, no small smiles across the hallway.

But it didn't feel right.

She wasn't sure what she feared more-getting close to him or realizing that she already had.

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The next day, Anshika sat at her usual spot in the campus garden, her sketchbook open but untouched. The afternoon carried the faint sound of laughter from a nearby group, but she barely noticed. Her mind was tangled in the events of the past few days-moments with Kartikey that felt too easy, too natural.

She exhaled sharply, pressing the eraser against the page before rubbing out a half-drawn sketch.

"Yeh ho kya raha hai?" she muttered to herself.

"What is happening?"

It wasn't as if he had done anything outright inappropriate. He was just... there. Always. With his teasing remarks, his perceptive gaze, his ability to say things that made her feel seen in a way no one else ever had. And she-she had started responding. Laughing sometimes. Engaging in conversations that stretched longer than they should.

"Galti kar rahi ho, Anshika," she told herself under her breath.

"You're making a mistake, Anshika."

She had been raised with clear boundaries. Unmarried girls from her family didn't get too close to boys, even if they were well-mannered and respectful. Especially not boys who made them question things they had never allowed themselves to consider.

She had always followed the rules. So why was she finding it so hard to maintain distance now?

Anshika had been noticing it lately-how easily Kartikey had started slipping into her life. It was in the way she found herself talking to him more than necessary, in the way she laughed at his teasing before realizing she shouldn't. It was dangerous, this ease, this familiarity.

No. She had to be careful. It wasn't about Kartikey, it was about herself. About knowing her place, her limits. About the fact that she couldn't afford to be seen with him too much, couldn't let herself get used to this... closeness.

The next few days were tough.

She maintained her distance, kept her conversations minimal. Kartikey noticed, obviously.

"Agar maine kuch galat bola hai, toh bata sakti ho." He cornered her near the canteen one afternoon, his expression unreadable.

"If I've said anything wrong, then you can tell me."

"Aisa kuch nahi hai, tum zyada soch rahe ho," she replied, eyes fixed on the table.

"It's nothing like that, you're overthinking,"

"Toh jo bhi chal raha hai, woh sirf main soch raha hoon?" He leaned in slightly, lowering his voice. "Ya tum jaan-bujh ke door ja rahi ho?"

"So whatever is happening, it's all in my thoughts? Or you're knowingly going away?"

Anshika swallowed hard. She had to end this before she got more entangled. "Koi farq nahi padta Kartikey," she said, finally meeting his gaze.

"It doesn't matter Kartikey,"

His jaw tightened. "Jhuth... aur mujhe farq padta hai Anshika."

"Lie... and it matters to me Anshika."

"Nahi padna chahiye," she said, lowering her eyes again.

"It shouldn't."

Something flickered in his eyes-hurt, disappointment, or maybe just frustration. "Tum hamesha yahi karti ho, Anshika," he said after a pause. "Jab baat confrontation pe aati hai, tum bhaagne lagti ho."

"You always do this, Anshika. Whenever it comes to confrontation, you run away."

She had nothing to say to that.

As he walked away, she told herself this was for the best.

Then why did it feel so wrong?

🌻

That night, Anshika lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, Kartikey's words echoing in her mind.

"Tum hamesha yahi karti ho, Anshika... jab baat emotions pe aati hai, tum bhaagne lagti ho."

She shut her eyes, as if that could block out the weight of his voice, the sharpness of his gaze. But it didn't. It only made it worse.

Why did it feel so wrong? She had done the right thing, hadn't she? She was protecting herself. From him. From the way he made her feel. From the inevitable pain that would follow if she let herself believe, even for a second, that someone like him could want someone like her.

But if she was so certain, why was her chest so tight? Why did she replay the way his expression had hardened-the way it had softened, just for a moment, when he said mujhe farq padta hai?

Her fingers curled into the blanket. It shouldn't matter. He shouldn't matter.

And yet, he did.

She felt like she was constantly walking a tightrope- one misstep, and everything would crumble beneath her.

Her days were meticulously structured, shaped by expectations that weren't just her own but deeply ingrained in her by her family and society. Academics first. No distractions. No mistakes. No room for failure. She had spent years perfecting the art of balancing on this thin line, ensuring she remained the dutiful daughter her family could be proud of. But lately, the weight of it all had started pressing down on her chest, making it harder to breathe.

For Anshika, college wasn't just about studying-it was about surviving. Every day was a battle between what she wanted to do and what she was supposed to do.

She wanted to dance. She had loved it since childhood, but she had never pursued it beyond the walls of her room because "Naachna gaana ache ghar ki ladkiyon ke kaam nahi hote." She wanted to speak up in class, but she always hesitated, afraid of saying something wrong, afraid of drawing attention to herself. She wanted to make friends, but the fear of disappointing her family held her back from fully embracing the world around her.

College was supposed to be about learning and growth, but for her, it often felt like a battlefield. Every assignment, every test, every presentation came with an unspoken pressure: Excel, or you are not enough. She had always been a bright student, but the fear of falling short loomed over her like a shadow. She couldn't afford to fail-not when her family had invested so much in her education, not when she was supposed to be the perfect example of discipline and focus.

But then why did she feel like she was suffocating?

And then there was Kartikey-the one person who unsettled her the most.

It was frustrating. Why was it so hard?

Did Kartikey's presence shake her in ways she couldn't explain?

He was a distraction-one she couldn't afford. And yet, whenever he was around, the tightrope she had been walking on for years felt more unstable than ever.

She hated this feeling-the uncertainty, the conflict, the voice in her head whispering that maybe, just maybe, she was meant for more than just following rules.

But stepping off the tightrope meant risking everything.

And she wasn't sure if she was brave enough to take that step.

She wasn't the kind of girl boys noticed. No one had ever looked at her twice, let alone paid her the kind of attention Kartikey did. She wasn't conventionally beautiful-at least, not in the way society defined beauty. She wasn't tall or striking, her features weren't delicate and sharp like the girls who turned heads effortlessly. She was... plain. Simple. The kind of girl who faded into the background, who was there but never the first choice.

And yet, Kartikey-the Kartikey, one of the most confident and effortlessly charming boys in college-paid attention to her. Why?

The question gnawed at her, filling her with confusion and doubt.

At first, she had assumed it was just casual friendliness, the way some people were naturally outgoing with everyone. But that didn't explain the way his gaze lingered on her a little longer than necessary. The way he teased her, as if he enjoyed pulling reactions out of her. The way he seemed genuinely invested in her presence, in her interests, in her thoughts.

Was it all just a joke to him?

That thought made her stomach twist uncomfortably. It wouldn't be the first time a guy had approached a quiet girl just for fun, to prove a point, or out of sheer curiosity. She had seen it happen before, heard stories of girls being led on, only to be laughed at later. She couldn't afford to be naive.

But... what if it wasn't a joke?

What if Kartikey actually meant it? What if he actually liked spending time with her?

That idea was even more terrifying.

Because if he did, then why? What did he see in her that she couldn't see in herself?

Her fingers curled into fists on the blanket, staring blankly at the ceiling. This uncertainty, this hope creeping into her heart-it was dangerous. It made her want things she had never allowed herself to want before. It made her question all the beliefs she had grown up with, all the things she had told herself to accept.

Maybe that's why she kept trying to push him away.

Because deep down, a part of her was scared-scared that if she let herself believe, if she let herself want him, she'd end up proving her own fears right.

And she wasn't sure if she could handle that.

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The next morning, as Anshika walked into the campus, she kept her head down, avoiding any chance encounter with Kartikey. Her heart raced at the mere thought of his teasing smile or the weight of his gaze on her. She couldn't afford to let herself get caught up in whatever this was. She had to stay focused. She had a life to build-a future that wasn't tainted by distractions.

But Kartikey, it seemed, had no intention of letting her go that easily.

As she walked past the college courtyard, she heard his familiar voice calling out to her.

"Anshika!"

She winced and kept walking, trying to ignore him.

"Yaar, Anshika, kyun bhaag rahi ho?" Kartikey's voice followed her, now closer, louder, like it was chasing her.

"Anshika, why are you running away?"

She didn't look back, but her pace quickened. Why couldn't he just let it go?

But Kartikey didn't give up. He stepped in front of her, blocking her path.

He raised an eyebrow, his expression unreadable. "Tum mujhe ignore kyun kar rahi ho, Anshika?"

"Why are you ignoring me, Anshika?"

Anshika took a deep breath, trying to steady herself. She hated how his presence affected her. "Main kuch nahi kar rahi hoon," she muttered, looking away from his searching gaze. "Bas... busy hoon."

"I'm not doing anything, I'm just busy."

And then she did what she thought was the best, she walked away.

Anshika kept ignoring Kartikey. Whenever he entered the room or crossed her path, her heart would race, and her mind would scramble to find a way to escape. She knew it was immature, childish even, but in that moment, the thought of facing him felt like too much.

During lunch, as she sat with her friends, she noticed him standing at the counter, his gaze sweeping across the room. Her stomach twisted. She quickly looked away, focusing intently on her food, as if her life depended on it. Her friends chatted around her, but her mind was elsewhere.

"Anshika, tu theek hai?" Priya, asked, noticing the distracted look on her face.

"Anshika, are you okay?"

"Hmm... main theek hoon," Anshika mumbled, her gaze flickering nervously toward Kartikey.

"Hmm... I'm fine,"

Priya followed her glance and raised an eyebrow. "Woh... wahan Kartikey hai na?"

"That... That's Kartikey there?"

Anshika felt her cheeks flush. "Mujhe nahi pata... maine... maine nahi dekha."

"I don't know... I... I didn't see."

"Anshika, you're acting weird," Priya pressed, leaning closer. "Woh kabse tujhe dekhe jaa raha hai. Agar tujhe nahi pasand, toh bol dena usse. You're making this awkward for yourself."

"He's looking at you since so long. If you don't like him then tell him."

Anshika tensed, trying to mask her panic. "Aisa kuch nahi hai, Priya."

"It's nothing like that, Priya."

Priya looked at her with curiosity but didn't push further. Anshika sighed in relief, grateful that the conversation had been diverted.

But as the day wore on, she couldn't shake off the feeling of his eyes on her. She could feel his presence even when he wasn't around, and it only made her more anxious. She had to focus on her work, on her studies-she couldn't afford to let him distract her.

Later, in class, she found herself sitting at her desk, completely absorbed in her notes. She heard the chair next to her scrape, and her heart skipped a beat. Without looking up, she knew it was him.

"You're not answering my messages," Kartikey's voice was low but unmistakable. His tone was playful, but there was an undercurrent of seriousness in it that made her heart flutter.

Anshika stiffened, feeling the weight of his presence beside her. "Dekhe nahi maine," she replied quickly, keeping her eyes on her notebook. She could feel him sitting so close that she could almost feel the heat from his body.

"I didn't see them."

"Jhuth, Anshika." he said, his voice soft, as if he knew exactly what was going on. "Main jaanta hoon tumne dekhe."

"Lie, Anshika. I know you saw them."

She bit her lip, her hands fidgeting nervously. "I was busy," she said, her voice betraying her inner conflict.

"Busy with what?" he asked, leaning slightly toward her, his voice full of curiosity.

Anshika bit her lip harder, desperately trying to focus on her notes, but the words wouldn't come out. How could she explain to him that it wasn't about being busy? That it was about avoiding the emotions he stirred in her, the fear that gripped her every time he paid attention to her? How could she explain that she was terrified of him getting too close and finding out how unworthy she felt?

"I... I just have a lot to focus on right now," she said finally, the lie slipping easily from her lips. But it wasn't enough to convince him.

Kartikey studied her, his gaze piercing. He seemed to be waiting for her to look at him, but Anshika kept her eyes fixed firmly on her notebook.

After a few moments, he sighed softly. "You know, you're not fooling anyone, right?"

Anshika's heart skipped a beat at his words. She dared a glance at him, her eyes meeting his for a split second. There was no amusement in his expression now-just something softer, something that made her feel vulnerable.

"Anshika," he said again, this time with more emphasis, "I'm not going to stop. Not until you tell me what's going on with you."

Her breath hitched. He wasn't giving up. And that terrified her.

"Main-" she began, but the words caught in her throat. She didn't know what to say. How could she explain to him the fear she felt, the fear of letting herself believe that someone like him could want someone like her?

"I-"

Before she could finish, the professor entered the room, and Kartikey stood up, much to Anshika's relief. But as he walked away, he paused for a moment and glanced back at her. His eyes held a silent promise-he wasn't going anywhere. He was waiting for her to face him, to face the truth, even if she wasn't ready for it yet.

Kartikey watched Anshika carefully from outside the window of her class, his brow furrowed in thought. She had been avoiding him, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't understand why.

Her behavior didn't add up. She was different from the other girls he had known-more complex, more guarded. He couldn't pinpoint exactly what it was about her that kept him coming back, but one thing was clear: he wasn't going to let her push him away so easily.

He had seen the way she hesitated when he spoke to her, the way she would look at him like she was fighting something inside. He could feel her walls-thick, but still, there was a crack. And he intended to find it.

He didn't know how to fix whatever was going on in her head, but he was sure of one thing: he wasn't giving up on her.

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The next morning, as Anshika made her way to the campus, her mind was still a whirlwind of confusion. She kept her head down, avoiding any direct contact with anyone, especially Kartikey. The last thing she wanted was to face him, to have him question her again. It was easier this way-ignoring him, pretending like the tension between them didn't exist.

But Kartikey, as always, seemed to have other plans.

She had barely settled into her seat in the library when she felt the familiar presence beside her. His voice was low, but unmistakable.

"Anshika," Kartikey said, his tone calm but firm. "Why are you doing this?"

She stiffened, fingers tightening around the book in front of her. She had hoped to avoid him today, but of course, fate had other plans. She didn't look up. "Doing what?" she replied, her voice as neutral as she could manage.

"You know exactly what I mean." There was a trace of frustration in his voice now, but also something softer, like he was genuinely trying to understand. "You're avoiding me."

Anshika tried to keep her gaze focused on the pages in front of her, but she could feel his eyes on her. It was like a constant pressure, one that made her skin itch.

"I'm not avoiding you," she said, her words coming out a little sharper than intended. "I'm just... busy."

"Busy with what?" His voice was low, but there was an edge to it now, as though he was unwilling to back down. "I know you don't have a problem with me. So why all the distance? Why are you acting like I'm some kind of stranger?"

She felt a sharp pang in her chest. It wasn't him-it was her. She didn't want him to see how much his attention unsettled her. She couldn't let him see the cracks in her carefully constructed walls. "I'm not acting," she said, her voice stiff, her heart pounding in her chest. "I just don't have time for all of this"

Kartikey leaned in slightly, his tone now softer, more patient. "All of this? All of this kya Anshika? I just... want to get to know you better."

Her pulse quickened at his words, but she masked it quickly. "I don't need to get to know anyone. I have enough on my plate."

"Is that really what it is?" He sounded like he didn't believe her, like he saw through her carefully constructed walls. "Ya kuch aur baat hai? Are you scared of what might happen if you let someone in?"

"Or is it something else?"

Anshika's breath hitched. He was too close to the truth, and that terrified her. She hadn't realized just how deeply her insecurities ran until now. How could she explain to him that she couldn't risk letting anyone get too close? How could she tell him that every moment she spent questioning his intentions made her feel like she was walking on the edge of a cliff?

"Aisa kuch nahin hai," she said quickly, almost too quickly. "I just don't want to waste time."

"It's nothing like that,"

Kartikey was silent for a moment, and when he spoke again, there was a shift in his voice-like he had made a decision. "Okay, Anshika. If that's really how you feel."

He stood up to leave, and the sudden distance between them made her heart ache. She didn't want him to go, didn't want him to think that she didn't care. But she couldn't let him see how much he affected her. She couldn't let him know how much his attention made her question everything she had ever believed about herself.

She stared at the book in front of her, the words on the page blurring as her mind raced. Had she just made a huge mistake?

Kartikey, on the other hand, walked away, his mind racing. He could sense her resistance, the way she pulled away whenever he got too close. It frustrated him, yes, but it also made him more determined. There was something about her, something that pulled at him, and he couldn't understand it. He didn't want to give up on her, but he also didn't want to push her too far, too fast.

What was it that made her so closed off? Why couldn't she let him in?

Kartikey knew that something deeper was going on with her. He could see the tension in her eyes, the way she seemed to retreat into herself every time he tried to reach out. It wasn't just about being shy or introverted-there was something more.

And he was determined to find out what it was.

But for now, he would wait. Because if there was one thing Kartikey knew, it was that sometimes, the best way to help someone was to be patient and give them the space to come to you when they were ready. He just hoped that, eventually, Anshika would be ready to face whatever it was that was holding her back.

Later that evening, as Anshika sat in her room, her phone buzzed. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw it was a message from Kartikey.

Kartikey: "I'm not giving up on you, Anshika. I'm here when you're ready to talk."

She stared at the message for a long moment, her fingers hovering over the screen. He wasn't giving up. Was he serious? Why was he so persistent?

A part of her wanted to respond, to ask him why he cared so much. But another part of her was terrified of the answer. What if he saw her as a challenge? What if he was just playing a game?

She tossed the phone aside, unable to deal with the flood of emotions threatening to overtake her. She needed time-time to sort through everything she was feeling, time to figure out what she truly wanted.

But the thought of Kartikey waiting for her, ready to talk whenever she was ready, lingered in her mind. And for the first time in a long while, Anshika felt something stir inside her-something unfamiliar, something that frightened her.

What if, just maybe, she didn't have to be afraid? What if she could let herself believe that she deserved more than the suffocating life she had created for herself?

The question echoed in her mind as she tried to sleep, but it refused to be answered.

🌻

The days that followed felt like a heavy weight on Anshika's chest. There was a stillness in the air between her and Kartikey, an unspoken understanding that they would no longer cross each other's boundaries. It had been his decision, for now. He had pulled back, giving her the space she needed, though it seemed like it wasn't what she truly wanted.

As Anshika sat in the cafeteria the next day, she felt the familiar ache in her heart as she watched him from a distance. Kartikey sat with his friends, laughing, carefree, but there was something different in his demeanor now. He didn't glance in her direction, didn't even seem to notice she was there. It was as if the entire room had suddenly shifted, and he was no longer part of her world. And she was no longer part of his.

Her friends, Meera and Priya, exchanged glances before turning to her. "Kya hua Anshika? Kartikey ke saath kuch hua hai kya?" Priya asked, her voice laced with curiosity.

"What happened Anshika? Did something happen with Kartikey?"

Anshika didn't know how to respond. What could she say? That Kartikey had backed off after her resistance? That his attention had become too overwhelming for her to handle?

She shrugged, forcing a small smile. "Kuch nahi, bas... aisehi." Her words felt hollow, even to her own ears.

"Nothing it's... just like that."

Meera raised an eyebrow. "Aise kaise? Tum dono toh... I mean woh tumhe pasand karta hai na?"

"Just like that? You two were... I mean he likes you?"

Anshika avoided their gazes, taking a bite of her food. She didn't want to get into it. Didn't want to talk about Kartikey anymore. He was the last person she wanted to think about, yet he was the only person occupying her thoughts.

Meanwhile, Kartikey sat at his table, his fingers tracing the edge of his phone absentmindedly. He hadn't heard from Anshika in days. The space he had given her had been harder than he anticipated. Each day felt longer, more torturous. He had hoped that the distance would help her open up, but all it did was leave him wondering whether he had made the right decision.

Was this what she wanted? he asked himself. Did I give her enough space, or did I push her away?

He glanced up, his eyes meeting hers for a brief moment before she quickly looked away. A pang of frustration hit him. He had been trying to be patient, to give her time to figure things out. But seeing her like this... cold and distant-it made his chest tighten.

"Everything alright, bro?" Arjun asked, nudging his elbow.

"Yeah," Kartikey replied, his voice low. "Just... thinking."

Arjun didn't push further, but Kartikey could tell he was worried. The concern in his eyes made Kartikey sigh, leaning back in his chair. He wasn't sure anymore. It was easier when he could just be with her. When her shy glances, her quiet presence, had been enough. But now, everything had changed.

Anshika, for her part, had resigned herself to the silence. It was easier this way. She had spent so many years building walls around herself, convincing herself that she wasn't worthy of love or attention, especially not from someone like Kartikey.

She had always been the quiet one, the one who stayed in the background, always afraid to step forward. And she knew, deep down, that she didn't belong in Kartikey's world. He was everything she wasn't: confident, charming, surrounded by friends, with people constantly competing for his attention.

A memory flashed in her mind. It was a memory from school, one she had buried long ago but still felt as sharp as ever.

She was standing alone in the school ground, watching her friends, laughing and sharing jokes. They were all close, a tight-knit group that seemed to have no room for her.

Anshika had tried to join them once, but the conversation felt forced. They were talking about things she didn't understand, things she wasn't invited to be a part of. She'd always felt like an outsider, a tag-along. The others were always talking about the latest trends, the latest gossip. They didn't need her. She wasn't the bubbly, talkative one who could effortlessly fit in.

Why would they want me there? she had thought. I'm just the quiet one, the one who stands on the sidelines, watching everything happen from a distance.

One day, during a group project, Anshika had tried to contribute. Her idea had been shot down almost immediately by her friends, and the momentary embarrassment had pushed her back into her shell. I'll never be like them, she had thought bitterly. I'll always be the odd one out.

but she had still tried.

This time will be different, she told herself, taking a deep breath before walking over to them.

"Hey, guys!" she greeted, her voice unsure but hopeful.

The group paused, and for a moment, Anshika thought maybe they would include her today. Shruti, smiled brightly at her. "Oh hey, Anshika! Where have you been?"

Anshika smiled back, trying to seem casual. "Just busy with homework, you know?"

"Of course!" Shruti nodded. "Come on, join us. We were just talking about the movie release next week. You should totally come with us!"

Anshika's heart lifted at the invitation. Maybe they want me here, maybe they actually want to be friends, she thought, but as she sat down next to them, something felt off. Her friends continued talking, but she felt like an outsider. They laughed at inside jokes she didn't get, casually referencing things that she had no idea about. Anshika tried to join in, mentioning something she'd recently seen, but the conversation quickly shifted away from her.

As the group carried on, Anshika caught a glimpse of herself in the reflection of a nearby window. Her usual awkwardness and quiet nature made her stand out in all the wrong ways. She did their work, helped them in studies, laughed at their jokes, tried to talk more, but nothing worked as her voice was always swallowed up by their more confident voices.

She felt her chest tighten as she watched them. They were so natural with each other, so comfortable. It was like she was invisible, trying so hard to fit in but never quite making it.

After a while, the group began to disperse, Shruti and the others huddling closer, leaving Anshika to trail behind. She lingered behind them, staring at the ground, her stomach in knots. No matter how hard she tried, she would always be on the outside looking in. The idea of changing herself to be part of their world felt exhausting, but it seemed like the only way to belong.

Why can't I just be like them? she thought. Why can't I be good enough?

It was in that moment that Anshika realized that no matter how much she changed, she would never truly feel like she belonged. She wasn't like them, and maybe, she thought, that was okay. But it didn't make it any easier to swallow.

The memory faded, but the sting remained. She had spent so many years convincing herself that being on the sidelines was safer. That if she didn't reach out, she couldn't be rejected. And that's why, when Kartikey had started paying attention to her, she'd shut him out. She didn't want to be in the center of his world, not when she knew she could never be the person he truly deserved.

And so, she had stayed away, just like she was staying away now.

Her mind snapped back to the present, and she noticed that Kartikey was looking at her again, this time with a slight frown on his face. Their eyes met for a heartbeat before he looked away, his jaw tightening.

Why does he keep doing that? Anshika thought, a rush of emotions flooding through her. Why does he care?

She quickly turned her gaze back to her food, not wanting to face the vulnerability that she could feel rising in her chest. What if he had made a mistake? What if he was just... being nice because he pitied her?

Across the room, Kartikey was conflicted. He wanted to go to her, to pull her aside and tell her that he understood-that he was willing to wait. But at the same time, a voice inside him warned him that he shouldn't push too hard, that he had already done enough for now. He didn't want to make things worse.

But then, just as he turned to leave, he saw her-Anshika, standing up to leave as well. As she walked past his table, her shoulder brushed against his ever so slightly. A brief moment. A fleeting touch. But in that second, something in Kartikey's chest clenched.

He froze.

Anshika didn't look back, didn't even seem to notice the tension in the air. But Kartikey did. His fingers twitched at his side, desperate to reach out, to touch her arm, to say something... anything.

But he didn't. He just stood there, watching her retreating figure, the ache of her absence gnawing at him.

What if she doesn't want me at all?

A flicker of doubt passed through him, but he quickly shook it off. He couldn't give up on her. Not yet. She just needs time.

As Anshika walked away, she felt something stir in her chest-a familiar, painful longing. For a moment, she almost thought she'd imagined it. But the look in his eyes, the briefest of touches, told her otherwise. It was real. And it made her heart ache all the more.

But she couldn't let herself feel anything. She had built her life around not feeling. Because when you let yourself feel too much, you open yourself up to hurt.

And she had been hurt before.

-------------------------------------------------------🌻

It was a typical afternoon, and Anshika had just finished her dance practice. She was on her way to the library, her mind preoccupied with the choreography she still needed to perfect. As she walked past the hallway, she noticed a small group gathered near the stairs. Her steps faltered when she saw Kartikey in the middle, surrounded by a few girls from the college, laughing and joking with them.

Anshika instinctively slowed her pace, trying not to draw attention to herself. She could hear their voices-bright, full of energy-laughing at something Kartikey had said. His deep chuckle echoed through the hallway, and the girls seemed to hang on to every word. They were all leaning in a little too close, their giggles light and flirtatious.

Anshika stood frozen for a moment, her gaze fixed on Kartikey, trying not to let her eyes linger too long. There was something about the way he carried himself, so at ease, so charming. His confidence was magnetic, and it was clear these girls were drawn to him.

For a fleeting second, a sharp, unfamiliar feeling stirred inside her. Why does it bother me? she asked herself.

Kartikey had always been surrounded by people. It wasn't anything new. He was the captain of the football team, the guy everyone admired and wanted to be around. But seeing him in the middle of this group, effortlessly making them laugh, made something twist in Anshika's chest.

She quickly looked down at her phone, pretending to check a message she hadn't received. She could feel her pulse quicken, but she refused to acknowledge the knot forming in her stomach.

It's nothing, she told herself. Why should I care?

She turned around, her footsteps quickening as she walked toward the library, trying to shake off the feelings swirling inside her. The scene kept replaying in her mind-the way the girls were looking at him, the way he responded to them so naturally.

But she refused to admit it. It's fine, she told herself again. There's no reason to be jealous. JEALOUS?? NO. NO. It's just... it's just...

Her mind couldn't quite finish the thought. The ache, the discomfort, the feeling of something being off-she couldn't define it, so she ignored it.

Still, as she stepped into the quiet of the library, she couldn't shake the image of Kartikey laughing with them, and the sudden ache in her chest refused to go away. But she wouldn't let it show.

Later that day, the seminar hall was buzzing with excitement as the two batches were paired together for a team-building activity. Anshika wasn't particularly thrilled about it, especially since she knew she'd have to work with people she barely spoke to. But what made her feel more uneasy was the fact that Kartikey was in the same group. She could already feel her heart race at the thought of having to interact with him in front of everyone.

As they gathered in a circle, Anshika kept her distance, making sure to stand at the farthest edge of the group. She looked down at her shoes, focusing on the simple task of not making eye contact with anyone-especially him.

"Okay, guys, for the first round, we need to pair up and solve a puzzle," Naren, their professor said clapping his hands together with enthusiasm. "Let's make it fun, no boring pairings!"

Anshika's eyes darted around, silently hoping she wouldn't get paired with Kartikey. But of course, fate had other plans.

"Anshika, Kartikey, you two are together," Naren said casually.

But.

Anshika's heart dropped. She quickly adjusted her posture and forced a smile, trying to mask her discomfort. She didn't want to show how much the idea of working with him bothered her. She immediately took a step back, glancing at the puzzle pieces laid out on the ground.

Kartikey, sensing her hesitation, gave her some space. He didn't say anything, but his quiet, understanding gaze told her he was respecting her boundaries. He crouched down to start organizing the pieces, careful to keep a distance between them.

Anshika sat down on the opposite side of the puzzle, her focus now completely on the pieces. She couldn't allow herself to think about anything else, especially not the way his presence seemed to fill the space around her. The air between them felt charged in a way she couldn't explain.

As they worked, there were moments when their hands almost touched. Once, Anshika reached for the same piece as Kartikey, and their fingers brushed. She quickly pulled her hand away, feeling a jolt run through her. She could feel the warmth of his touch linger on her skin, but she didn't dare look up. Instead, she continued sorting the pieces, pretending nothing had happened.

"Yeh itna tricky kyun hai," she muttered, trying to distract herself. She was stalling, avoiding looking at him as much as possible.

"Why is this so tricky,"

Kartikey smiled softly, his voice calm and understanding. "Haan, complicated hai. Par hum kar lenge," he said, his tone gentle. We can do it.

"Yes it is complicated, but we can do it."

Little did she know he wasn't only talking about the puzzle.

Anshika nodded, forcing herself to focus on the puzzle again. She could feel his gaze on her, but she didn't dare meet his eyes. She was afraid that if she did, everything would come rushing back-the confusion, the emotions, the way her heart seemed to skip whenever he was near.

As they continued working, there was another moment when their arms brushed as they both reached for the same piece. This time, Anshika couldn't ignore the warmth that spread through her body. She could feel her breath catch in her throat, and she quickly pulled back, her face turning slightly red.

"Sorry," she muttered under her breath, hoping no one had noticed.

"Don't worry about it," Kartikey replied, his voice softer than before, as if he was trying to make her feel comfortable. He smiled briefly, but the smile didn't reach his eyes. There was something there, a quiet understanding between them that neither of them acknowledged.

The others didn't seem to notice the tension. But Naren, sitting on the other side, laughed and called out, "Arre yaar, Anshika, Kartikey, you both are too slow! Haan, complicated puzzle hai, but you should hurry up!"

"Yes it's a complicated puzzle,"

Anshika shot Naren a quick, embarrassed glance, but quickly turned her attention back to the puzzle. Kartikey, meanwhile, picked up another piece and handed it to her. His fingers brushed hers again, but this time, he didn't pull away immediately. His touch lingered for just a second longer, almost as if he was trying to reassure her that everything was okay.

Anshika didn't know what to make of it. Was he being kind, or was there something more? But before she could dwell on it, Naren spoke up, breaking her thoughts.

"Alright, looks like you two are almost done," Naren said with a grin. "Good job, Anshika, Kartikey, the next pair from your group is Vikram and Avni."

Anshika nodded quickly, avoiding his gaze. It's fine, she told herself. Just finish this and get it over with. But deep down, she couldn't shake the feeling that, despite her best efforts to avoid him, there was something between them. Something she wasn't ready to acknowledge.

Kartikey, on the other hand, seemed content to let her take the lead, his quiet presence beside her almost comforting. He wasn't pushing, wasn't rushing her, and for some strange reason, that made her heart beat a little faster than she wanted to admit.

As the activity continued, Kartikey couldn't help but glance at her once more. For a brief moment, their eyes locked, and in that silent exchange, he could feel the weight of everything they hadn't said.

Maybe it's not just me, he thought. Maybe, just maybe, she feels it too.

-------------------------------------------------------🌻

Anshika was lost in the rhythm of the music, her body moving with practiced precision as she rehearsed the new dance routine. It had been a long practice session, but she was determined to get every step right. The sound of her feet hitting the floor echoed through the dance studio, and for a moment, she forgot everything else-her insecurities, the distance between her and Kartikey, the tension that had been building up in the past few days.

But then, as she attempted a complicated turn, her foot caught on the floor, and she felt a sharp pain shoot up her leg. Her ankle twisted awkwardly, and she collapsed onto the floor, gasping in pain.

"Argh!" she cried out, feeling a sharp pain shoot up her ankle. She clutched her ankle, the sting almost unbearable. She tried to move it but only winced in pain. Not now, she thought, but the tears were already threatening to spill.

A few of the other dancers rushed towards her.

"Anshika, tu theek hai?" Mehak, one of her dance mates, knelt beside her, concern lacing her voice.

"Anshika, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Anshika gritted out, pressing her hand to her ankle. The truth was, she wasn't. The pain was already beginning to increase, and she knew she had messed up her ankle.

"Infirmary chal," another girl suggested, but Anshika shook her head.

"Let's go to the infirmary,"

"Nahi, it's nothing. Thodi der mein theek ho jayega." She forced a small smile, willing herself to believe her own words.

"No, it'll be fine in sometime."

Aksh shook his head in frustration. "Fine, agar tum nahi sunogi, toh mujhe kisi aur se help leni padegi."

"If you won't listen, then I'll have to take someone else's help."

Before Anshika could protest, Aksh stormed out of the studio.

Kartikey was wiping the sweat off his face, catching his breath after an intense practice session, when he noticed Aksh running toward the field.

"Kartikey!" He called out, urgency in his tone.

He straightened up immediately. "Kya hua?"

"What happened?"

"Anshika," He panted, trying to catch his breath. "She sprained her ankle in the dance studio, but she's refusing to take help. She can't even stand."

For a second, Kartikey stood still, his jaw tightening. Then, without a second thought, he dropped his water bottle and took off in a sprint.

"Kartikey, ruk-" Aksh started, but he was already halfway across the field.

"Kartikey, wait-"

The moment Kartikey heard Anshika and hurt in the same sentence, he didn't think twice. Without another word, he took off in a sprint towards the dance studio, his heartbeat pounding louder than his footsteps against the ground.

His mind raced. Why is she always like this? Why is she hurt??

By the time he reached the studio, his chest was rising and falling heavily from the run, but his concern overpowered his exhaustion. He stepped inside, his sharp gaze sweeping over the room until it landed on her-sitting on the floor, clutching her ankle, pain flickering across her features despite the forced calmness she was trying to maintain.

And yet, no one had done anything.

"Why hasn't anyone taken her to the infirmary yet?" he demanded, his voice sharp and angry.

The group inside froze. Anshika, sitting on the floor with her leg propped up, looked up at him with wide eyes.

Anshika swallowed. "Kar-"

But before she could form an excuse, Kartikey was already moving. Without another word, he crouched down and, in one swift motion, scooped her up into his arms.

-------------------------------------------------------🌻

*SCREAMSSSSSS CRIESSSSSS*

I hope everyone will enjoy this chapter, let me know your reviews pleaseee.

Lots of love to everyone who's reading and supporting🌻💗


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